Are You and Your Partner Struggling With Conflict and Disconnection?

  • Does it seem as though intimacy, passion and care have faded from your relationship?
  • Are you and your partner finding yourselves in the same circular arguments, leaving you both feeling unheard and misunderstood?
  • Do you avoid bringing up important topics because you fear they will cause an argument?
  • Has an affair or another breach of trust caused a schism in your relationship?
  • Are career, financial or family stresses creating tension and distance between you and your partner?
  • Do you worry that you and your partner are sexually incompatible?
  • Alternately, do you feel happy in your relationship, but want to continue nurturing the healthy foundation you share, especially if you are preparing for marriage?
  • Do you wish you could learn positive ways to communicate, reconnect and fall in love with your partner again?

No matter how long you and your significant other have been together, navigating relationship issues can be disheartening and isolating. You may feel as though you don’t have anyone you can talk to about these relationship problems, especially if you and your partner share friend groups or feel embarrassed or guilty about the fractures in your relationship. It might seem as though no one can offer the nonjudgmental, unbiased insight you need to resolve conflicts and move forward in a way that supports you both.

Or, if you and your partner are doing well and envisioning your life together, you may wish to further develop your communication skills so you can continue to operate as a loving team, regardless of what challenges arise.

Whether you’re in the midst of a painful period in your relationship, or you wish to prepare for the future, you might wonder what you can do to build the satisfying, lasting relationship you long for.

All Relationships Take Work and Commitment

Because relationships are built up of unique individuals—with different backgrounds, personalities and communication styles—occasional disagreement and frustration are inevitable. Add to that the stress of balancing work responsibilities, personal hobbies, social and family obligations and everything else that makes up a person’s life, and it’s no wonder that couples sometimes drift apart, experience tension or face other relationship problems.

Movies, television shows, social media feeds and other messaging often depict the ideal of a “perfect” relationship, which can make it all the more painful when it seems that your relationship doesn’t meet that standard. In truth, however, no relationship is perfect, and there is hope to reconnect with your partner and build a supportive, trusting relationship.

Couples Therapy Can Bring You and Your Partner Together

Our couples therapists are here to help whether you are dealing with a crisis, a challenging transition, seeking to make changes around troublesome behaviors or just looking to improve an already good relationship. We work with couples of all orientations, backgrounds and stages, from partners to spouses to those seeking premarital counseling. We will create an atmosphere of safety and trust with your significant other, where you can be vulnerable and practice listening to each other. Our goal is to help you understand and feel understood within your relationship.

We Are Always Here For You

During couples counseling, you can:

  • Bring increased satisfaction, joy and understanding to the relationship
  • Become more aware of and connected to each other’s emotions
  • Improve communication and listening skills
  • Face and resolve conflict in a more effective manner
  • Repair trust and insecurities
  • Regain individuality within the relationship
  • Cope with differences in lifestyle choices
  • Enhance intimacy
  • Learn how to deal with recurrent issues within the relationship
  • Overcome issues around extended family

Our approach to couples therapy combines elements of many schools of thought, depending upon the needs of the couple. We draw from training in Emotional Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), Imago Relationship Counseling, and Gottman to help couples work through their issues on a deep, lasting level. Some of the things that we will work on with your couples therapist include gaining practical tools to help you feel more connected to your partner, learning to manage emotions and addressing repetitive patterns that continue to cause stress within your relationship. In time, you and your partner can develop new, productive relationship patterns and feel equipped to face future challenges with shared trust and mutual respect.

You Don’t Have to Do It Alone

You may have questions or concerns about individual therapy…

Although working with a couples therapist does involve communicating and talking to your partner, having a partner who is an introvert or who tends to be quiet is not unusual. The fact that he or she has committed to improving the relationship and attending the sessions is what is needed for counseling to be beneficial.

If this is your situation, that’s okay. Attending counseling by yourself in order to improve your relationship can still be very helpful. Sometimes this is how counseling begins, with the other person joining the therapy sessions later. Whatever you learn while attending on your own can be taken back into the relationship and shared with your partner

Our therapists act as neutral, unbiased observers and guides. Rather than take sides, we strive to understand where each person is coming from and what his or her story is, because every behavior has a reason. In therapy, you and your partner can find the acceptance and understanding you need to honestly examine your relationship and create positive change.

Yes! Our couples therapists work with both straight and same-sex couples with non-traditional relationship structures. We understand how open relationships, polyamorous relationships and other non-monogamous relationships work and understand the unique challenges that they may face.

The goal of therapy is to find the healthiest outcome for both partners. Sometimes, that does mean the end of the relationship. If you and your partner come to this decision, your therapist can help you both get to a healthy place and find a sense of satisfaction and resolution.

Sometimes, when things are going well, we unintentionally put relationship work on the back burner. Even if you aren’t experiencing relationship problems, therapy offers a valuable opportunity to spend dedicated time with your partner, without the distractions we so often experience today. Together, you can foster a deeper understanding of each other and equip yourselves for a loving, connected future.

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Lynnhaven Counseling

575 Lynnhaven Pkwy #325
Virginia Beach, VA 23452
Open Everyday 7am – 7pm